Two aliens landed in the desert near a gas station that was closed for the night.
They approached a gas pump and the younger alien said, “Greetings, Earthling. We come in peace. Take us to your leader.”
The gas pump, of course, didn’t respond.
The younger alien became angry.
The older alien said, “I’d calm down if I were you.”
The younger alien ignored the warning and repeated his greeting. Again, no response.
Pissed at the pump’s attitude, he drew his ray gun and said louder, “Greetings, Earthling. We come in peace. Take us to your leader or I will fire!”
The older alien again warned his comrade saying, “You don’t want to do that! That will make him mad.”
“Rubbish,” said the young alien. He aimed his weapon and opened fire. There was a huge explosion. A massive fireball roared towards him and blew him off his feet and threw him in a burnt, smoking mess about 200 yards away.
Half an hour later when he finally regained consciousness, he refocused his three eyes, straightened his bent antenna, and saw the older, wiser alien who was shaking his big, green head.
“What a ferocious creature!” exclaimed the young, fried alien. “He damn near killed me! How did you know he was so dangerous?”
The older alien leaned over, placed a friendly feeler on his crispy friend and replied,
“If there’s one thing I’ve learned during my intergalactic travels, you never mess with a guy who can loop his penis over his shoulder twice and then stick it in his ear.”
Credit to Sugit (Japan)