Anxiety

A poem by Sambuddha, included in the guidebook for Padma’s Sacred She Tarot deck, for the XVIII Anxiety card in the Spirit suit

XVIII Anxiety – Spirit

Whenever we are blinded to the obvious, choosing instead to believe in conjured-up narratives, we trick ourselves like Wile E. Coyote does. Fascination with his own cleverness keeps him perpetually distracted, and so he repeatedly trips over his own tail and commits the same mistakes – traps himself, appears foolish, reckless, laughable.

By taking ourselves, our beliefs, and opinions too seriously, we become hypnotized by the brilliance of our imagined reality. Dreamt-up fictions spawn fearfulness that can degenerate into paranoia, devastating the quality of life.

Looking into the roots of our fears and anxiety takes courage. By refusing to admit to the pain we feel, which often is rooted in the long-ago past, we stay trapped in the strangle hold of dread.

Answering these may be helpful:

What are you refusing to accept, or longing to communicate?

Is there something hidden within your distress that might reveal what is keeping it going?

Is it really anxiety that hurts, or your reluctance to depart from the cozy security of trumped-up fantasies, imagined storylines, paranoid projections?

I am a coyote, lurking in the shadows, frightened by the light, but drawn by the heat.

Wanting to be warmed but not burned, filled but not consumed.

I struggle because that’s what minds do, whipsawed by hope and fear.

I fight to preserve a life I despise. The alternative being so vast.

If I could find some basis, some viewpoint, some foundation that could not be doubted, would it give me peace, like a lily pad for a frog or a burrow for a hare?

Somehow it seems more honest to talk about my troubles than the gentle song of waves, shimmering in moonlight, lapping on the shore.

Sambuddha

Sambuddha (Dr. Benjamin Stott, DAOM, L.Ac.) is the cofounder of Three Harmonies Acupuncture with more than thirty years of experience. He studied in China and is also a martial artists, meditator and poet.

Deva Padma

Padma is an internationally exhibited artist, the creator and designer of the Osho Zen Tarot and the Tao Oracle. Her work includes paintings, collages, mixed media, book illustrations, and CD covers. embraceart.com – thesacredshetarot.com

The Sacred She Tarot Deck and Guidebook
A Universal Guide to the Heart of Being
by Ma Deva Padma – thesacredshetarot.com
Atria Books / Beyond Words Publishing, an imprint of Simon & Schuster – simonandschuster.com
Includes 78 cards and a 232-page guidebook
Available from Barnes & Noble – Bookshop – Beyond Words and from amazon.com* – amazon.co.uk* – amazon.de* – amazon.in – or in your country.