Archive for Jokes

The florist

A new business was opening and one of the owner's friends wanted to send him flowers for the occasion.

Taking a sick day

A woman calls her boss one morning and tells him that she is staying home because she is not feeling well.

Harry and Charlie

A couple has two little boys called Harry and Charlie, who are always getting into trouble.

Childhood sweethearts

Larry and Sally, an elderly married couple who were once childhood sweethearts had settled down in their old neighbourhood. 

The bouquet

A cartoon by Liz Climo.

Be my Valentine

Rodney walks into a Florida post office one day to mail a registered letter.

The lodge meeting

Maureen says goodbye to her husband Melvin, who is driving to town to attend a scheduled lodge meeting.

Teenage daughter

A mother is cleaning her teenage daughter's room.

The matter of seat belts

Madge was driving down the highway and pulled over to the side of the road when the policeman driving behind her turned on his lights and siren.

Jokes about blondes

A young ventriloquist is touring Norway and puts on a show in a small fishing town.

The vet

Sheryl, a veterinarian, was feeling ill and went to see her doctor.

Crawling home

Alfred got really drunk one night in his local pub.

There’s no justice in this world

Here is this guy who really takes care of his body; he lifts weights and jogs five miles every day.

Just want you to know…

Kamalesh is walking past a house located in a narrow alley in Rishikesh.

Back-seat passenger

Done with my shift, I parked my police car in front of the station.

The mind

Lorraine had just fixed breakfast for herself and her husband, Ethan.

Air conditioning

Gurdeep decided to try out a new restaurant in Greater Kailash, Delhi.

Our Norman

My friend Norman was in front of me coming out of church one day, and the preacher was standing at the door as he always is to shake hands.

The baby sister

Used to being the centre of attention, Robbie was a little more than jealous of his new baby sister.

What am I?

Mr. Mohandas had been giving his second-grade students a short lesson on science.

Sunday church service in the little town of Goodwill

After he had given his sermon, the minister asked if anyone in the congregation would like to express praise to the Lord for answered prayers.

Indian taxi

A Japanese tourist hailed a taxi in down-town Delhi and asked to be taken to Indira Gandhi airport.

Shingles

A guy walked into a doctor's office and the receptionist asked him what he had.

Born-again

The young teacher explains to her class of third graders that she is a born-again Christian.

Bad or terrible news first?

A grumpy Rodney was sitting in his attorney's office.

10 New Year’s resolutions

help to mess with people's minds.

We definitely all need change…

A 4-year-old girl talks about her problem with New Year's resolutions.

Traffic on New Year’s eve

A police officer is on duty on a busy one-way street in Manhattan late at night.

A good girl

Young Tara comes home from a New Year's Eve party.

New Year’s eve worries

Nina and Lisa were chatting at the wild New Year's Party.

Introducing newcomers to college

The Dean of Women thought fit to touch the subject of sex morality.

Little Basil

Santa Claus sits in London’s Harrods department store when little Basil’s mom seats him on his knee.

Pine-scented spray

An Avon Lady was delivering products in a high-rise and was riding up in the elevator.

The Christmas raffle

Several days before Christmas, Joe, Mason and Kevin were sitting in a bar enjoying a few quiet drinks, when they decided to get in on the Christmas raffle.

Chrismukah – the merger

Continuing the current trend of large-scale mergers and acquisitions, it was announced at a government press conference yesterday, that Christmas and Hanukkah will be merged.

Stressed-out Santa Claus

One particular Christmas season a long time ago, Santa was ready for his Christmas run... but there were problems.

A Hanukkah tree?

Little Mordecai and his father are taking a walk through their neighbourhood in Brooklyn.

Chopping wood

A lady is giving a party for her granddaughter, and has gone all out - caterer, band, and a hired clown.

Early winter season this year!

It had been snowing all night and when I woke up, the snow had piled up all over the driveway and in front of the house.

Inside the Bible

Little Jayden was allowed to look at the big and old family Bible.

Cruising at three knots

An old retired sailor puts on his old uniform and goes down to the docks for old times' sake.

50.000 Euro

A lawyer in a court in Naples, Italy was cross-examining a witness.

In a sleepy Midwest backwater

Ma was in the kitchen fiddling around when she hollers out...

Early morning in Paris

At an apartment, the doorbell rings early in the morning.

Supersex

A little old lady was walking up and down the halls in a nursing home.

Frog noise

A little girl and her brother are whispering to each other.

Divorce proceedings

A judge was asking for information from a woman in court regarding her pending divorce.

Flight 1234

Dialogue between air traffic controller and airline pilot overheard:

Trapped in his seat

A little guy gets on a plane and sits on his allocated middle seat.

The whiskey remedy

A depressed-looking man walked into a bar in New York and asks the bartender for 10 shots of whiskey.