Little Billy returns home from school…
There are 15 of them…
Toward the end of Sunday service, the Minister asked…
by Steven Wright.
An elderly man in Queensland had owned a large property for several years.
A mortician was working late one night.
A guy gets home early from work and hears strange noises coming from the bedroom.
A teacher asks her class:
You are driving along in your car on a wild, stormy night…
There were three good arguments that he was…
A police officer called the station on his radio.
Good news for struggling spellers of all nationalities.
“Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose girl.”
A true joke!
A group of 40-year-old girlfriends discussed where they should meet for dinner….
During a service at a synagogue…
An Alexander County Deputy pulled a car over on I-57 about 2 miles north of the Missouri stateline.
A man marries a women who is a very good cook.
A selection from stand-up comedian Romesh Ranganathan’s routine.
A guy walked into a bar with a pet alligator by his side.
A woman and a man are involved in a car accident; it’s a bad one.
When NASA was preparing for the Apollo Project…
A burglar broke into a home.
One minute you’re young, hip and carefree and the next minute you’re photographing vegetables in your garden.
When you are in your casket, and friends, family, and congregation are mourning over you, what would you like to hear them say?
A senior citizen called her husband during his drive home.
Teacher: “Kids, what does the chicken give you?”
…is to accomplish my resolutions for 2022.
A Scotsman was out having a very good time on Saturday night…
A cartoon by Liz Climo.
A little old lady goes to the doctor.
How do you make holy water?
An English couple decided to adopt a little German boy.
There is a man, dying in his bed in his home.
I fly often for business.
A shepherd was tending his flock in a remote pasture…
Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
The old Italian Mafia Don is dying and he calls his grandson to his bed.
Seven incidents to demonstrate the universality of idiocy.
Unashamedly stolen from iNEWS, compiled by Alex Nelson, October 26, 2022.
Have you ever tried to eat a clock? It’s time-consuming.
Do not trust atoms. They make up everything.
I changed my iPad’s name to Titanic. It’s syncing now.
A wife invited some people to dinner.
Being unable to stand and leave without first saying “right!”
A man stops by his doctor’s office.
One day, Orson and Cedric went to a steak house for dinner.
Why would Mark Zuckerberg be a very good taxi driver?
One night at 3am I took a cab and asked the driver to take me home.
Little Johnny’s teacher is doing her rounds at lunchtime…
After a long and serious operation, Edna ended up in a coma.
A doctor and an engineer went into a chocolate store.
Not to brag, but just went into another room and actually remembered why I went in there.
I hate it when people act all intellectual and talk about Mozart…
A father was at the beach with his children…
Sherlock Holmes and his assistant Watson were hiking one day in the woods when it began to get dark.
A young man was watching the news when the reporter switched to the traffic.
Dev was walking home when a frog called him from the edge of the pavement.
During my siblings’ and cousins’ weddings…
A proud father brought home a swing set.