Radhika’s reflections on an observation she made
A mild late summer’s day favoured a boat trip on a lake in northern Italy. The lake’s large size offered the opportunity for a longer cruise across the smooth surface of the water, whose blueness hinted at unfathomable depths. A friendly sun caressed everything on the upper deck of the ship. As did the elegant woman right in front of me: With her left hand placed on her husband’s back she stroked, caressed and massaged his shoulders and neck area with devoted care. The sturdy, slightly overweight man sat motionless. They never talked. From time to time I wondered when her ministrations would come to an end. They never did. However, her man did not seem to receive this loving attention with much gratefulness. He never seemed to melt or relax. He didn’t touch her in return, not even to rest his hand on her leg as a natural gesture.
Why, I asked myself, has she been doing this for over an hour now? There is obviously no gratitude and no exchange of energies. I came to the conclusion that she was actually the one who would have been delighted to receive what she gave. There… I could, actually, easily stretch out my arms and start massaging the back of her neck. And, like most of us, I could have used the same treatment at that moment! Then the one massaging me could also be a receiving person and so on – until we had formed a complete circle! Although I don’t think the man in front of me would have joined in, as everyone else on deck would not have wanted to. In this world, these things are out of question.
During my time as part of the page-designing team for the Osho Times print magazine, in the late 1990s, sometimes, and without previous announcement, participants of bodywork groups would enter our workspace with a smile to pamper us with some of their newest / latest skills. I recall my hair being gently pulled away from my scalp in all directions, my face sort of being remodelled, and back muscles stiffened by computer hours softening again. Being with Osho provides the freedom to stay clear of becoming stagnant, rigid or settled in any way – since any kind of work can extend to meditation, playfulness, and being totally in the moment, whilst at the same time remaining centered, and a watchful non-doer. In this milieu it is established that we all deserve care and love at every moment of the day.
I don’t think the man on that ship provided the same loving service to his wife. I really hope that this generous woman, not minding his lack of participation, gets her own regular massage sessions. Next time I’ll gently nudge her, and suggest this.
Featured image by Andrey K on Unsplash
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