One-Liners for the over 70

Jokes

I don’t suffer from insanity – I enjoy every minute of it! I used to have a handle on life, but it broke. Don’t take life too seriously – no one gets out alive. You’re just jealous because the voices only talk to me. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe. I’m not a

I don’t suffer from insanity – I enjoy every minute of it!

I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.

Don’t take life too seriously – no one gets out alive.

You’re just jealous because the voices only talk to me.

Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.

I’m not a compete idiot – some parts are missing!

God must love stupid people. He made so many!

The gene pool could use a little chlorine.

Consciousness: that annoying time between naps.

Being “over the hill” is much better than being under it.

Wrinkled was not one of the things I wanted to be when I grew up.

Procrastinate now!

A hangover is the wrath of grapes.

A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.

He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless dead.

Ham and eggs – a day’s work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig.

I smile because I don’t know what the heck is going on.

Credit Kul

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