Maitreya discovers that his spiritual path very much resembles that of Hermann Hesse’s Siddhartha
In November of this year, I gave an interview to a YouTube channel called Histórias com Osho, sharing my path as a sannyasin. Early in the conversation, I mentioned that together we would look back and unravel the mysteries of my life. It had been a long time since I’d seen my own story with any clarity.
At one point, one of the interviewers asked, “Have you read Siddhartha, by Hermann Hesse?”
I hadn’t. “The book, right? Why?” I replied.
“If you read it, you’ll see yourself in it,” he said.
And he was right.
My journey, like Siddhartha’s, began like that of a monk, an ascetic. I spent two years devoted solely to the pursuit of nirvana. Meditation was tense, difficult, often frustrating – and my life felt like a desert where nothing could bloom.
Two years later, while watching New Year’s fireworks, I suddenly cried. I didn’t know why at the time, but in the interview it became clear: I had been asking for guidance.
Then something unimaginable happened.
I fell in love with a beautiful woman – as enchanting as Kamala, Siddhartha’s beloved, and as graceful as Yashodhara, the famed wife of Gautama. Her presence was hypnotic: her hair, her elegance, her lips…
“She drew him close, and Siddhartha bent his face to hers, placing his mouth upon lips that looked like a freshly-cut fig.” (p. 72)
With difficulty, and just as Siddhartha once did, I told myself: Let go of meditation for now. Walk the path of love with your whole being.
Two years passed, and I found myself exhausted, lost, miserable.
To rediscover myself, I took a month‑long trip to a beautiful region of Brazil, surrounded by nature. I had no idea that some of the most defining moments of my life awaited me there: befriending a magnificent river and encountering a waterfall so powerful it stole my breath. Like the Indian seeker, I had my first experiences of true oneness.
“Everything happened just as I thought. The river spoke to you. He is your friend as well.” – Vasudeva to Siddhartha
After his time as an ascetic, his rejection of Gautama, his lessons in love with Kamala and in business with Kamasvami, and his merging with the river, Siddhartha finally came home.
When I returned from my journey, I had two dreams with Osho and took sannyas. Since then, much has unfolded.
When the book finally arrived at my home, I was filled with joy. As I read it, I relived every step of Siddhartha’s journey. With each chapter, new layers opened within me – layers I hadn’t known existed.
When Siddhartha becomes an ascetic, I felt his pride, his self‑mortification, his resolve, his sincerity.
When he meets Kamala, a wave of longing rose within me: Yes. Go. Lose yourself in her arms forever.
When he becomes a businessman, carrying echoes of his earlier austerities, I felt his quiet delight at being in the world but not of it – living as a kind of outsider.
I cried again when Siddhartha stood at the edge of suicide, hollowed out by years of wealth and misery, with no song left in his heart.
And finally, I felt peaceful, still, serene, when he returned to the river and came home. I could sense his eyes, his wisdom, his grace. Siddhartha had become a Buddha in his own right.
Hesse writes with a power and poetry that seem to carry a fragrance from another world. I’m not surprised it was one of Osho’s favourite books.
But I am surprised that Hesse himself wasn’t a Buddha.
A person can write beautiful things and still not be enlightened.
“This Siddhartha is a strange man. He speaks curious ideas. His doctrine seems foolish. Yet his hands, his feet, his eyes, his brow, his way of breathing, smiling, walking… this one is a saint.” (p. 162)
The same applies to me.
What I write isn’t ‘me’. I cannot claim authorship.
Slowly, gently, without hurry, I’m realising that my life no longer belongs to me.
And it all began six years ago, on that journey, when I met the river – and became its friend.
Related articles
- Let your God become a river – Osho mentions Siddhartha as depicted in Hermann Hesse’s eponymous book, from The Dhammapada: The Way of the Buddha, Vol. 5, Ch 3
- Osho Speaks on Hermann Hesse – Osho declares him as one of the Western minds who has come very close to the Eastern way of looking at things, from Yoga: The Alpha and the Omega, Vol 7, Q 2 and The Eternal Quest, Ch 8
- The whole history of all those who want to be loved – Osho speaks on a story by Hermann Hesse from The Transmission of the Lamp, Ch 4, Q 2
- 6. Truth Is Unspeakable – Osho mentions Hermann Hesse’s Siddhartha as one of his favourite books in Books I Have Loved, Series 3, Session 5
- Hermann Hesse: I have been and still am a seeker – biography of the poet – by Antar Marc and Bhagawati
Links
- Histórias com Osho – Maitreya – video interview (in Portuguese)
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