(4 January 1951 – 28 May 2019)
A tribute from Avinasho (Viha Connection):
It was with great sadness that we received the news that Samarpan left his body in the early morning hours of May 28. He died in a hospital in Curitiba in the state of Paraná (South Brazil) a few days after having suffered a stroke. He is survived by his mother, one sister, three brothers, and many cousins, nieces, and nephews; all of them loved him very much and are devastated by his death.
Samarpan was born and raised in Brazil and was expected to become a priest. He stayed in the seminary for about a year, but then left and from then on was vehemently against the Catholic Church.
Dhanyam and I first met Samarpan (which was not yet his name then) around 1988 when he came to Viha to watch Osho videos. He was already in love with Osho and soon left for Pune and took sannyas. Over the next 30 years he was a beloved friend; he helped us in many ways, on many occasions: he took care of our cats when we were away and helped with the mailing of the Viha Connection; but most importantly, he provided music for satsang many times. He was a gifted and sensitive musician, always playing his own creations on keyboard.
He took several trips to Pune and in the mid-90s lived at Osho Rachana, near Seattle, Washington; he also stayed for a short time at Osho Shambala in Ithaca, New York. Most of the time he lived in the Bay Area.
Samarpan was one of those rare people who even as adults keep their beautiful childlike qualities: he was innocent and playful and always seemed full of wonder. He was enthusiastic about everything he engaged in: he did Dynamic for years, never missing a day. During his photography phase he went everywhere with his camera and took wonderful photos. When he rediscovered his love of music, he owned eight keyboards and practiced all the time. For many years he had all kinds of jobs here in Marin but eventually he found work as a school bus driver, and that was an ideal fit for him. He loved the kids, and they loved him. They probably enjoyed his playfulness just as we did. He was also well liked by his colleagues (“He always shows up, and he is always cheerful!”) although he sometimes parked the bus where it completely blocked all traffic and then he disappeared. Another time he brought his latest toy, a remote-controlled little helicopter, into the staff room where it promptly crashed into a window.
After working very happily for the same school district for about 10 years, he did not pass the annual physical exam because of different health issues, and he could no longer drive. Losing his job threw him into a deep depression. For a while he tried to find other work, but it soon became clear that living in the Bay Area without a steady job was not an option, and he decided to return to Brazil. Shortly before his departure he played music for satsang one more time although he was already suffering from almost paralyzing anxiety.
Back in Brazil, he moved in with his sister who very lovingly took care of him, but his physical and mental health continued to deteriorate. For a while he and I stayed in touch by email, but then he no longer replied to my messages. Once or twice a family member wrote back that Samarpan was not well enough to write. One of his nieces, who lives in the US, told me that he felt enormous guilt for having lived away from his family for a long time and did not want to live any longer, refusing all medical help.
Samarpan’s body was cremated at his request. When the lady who was taking care of his body before the cremation opened the coffin, she realized that he was a sannyasin because the family had placed some items into the coffin with him. She told them that she too was a sannyasin, and somehow this “coincidence” was comforting for everyone.
Bon voyage, Samarpan. We love you, and we miss you!
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I have so many fond memories of our time at Rachana… I always appreciated your sense of humor and of celebrating everything. For example, I remember you called the community together for an important announcement… over champagne you announced it had been 10 years since you had last had a lover… You had a wonderful way of transforming any situation and coming out the other side with laughter and delight. Your playfulness and humor made the world a lighter and better place. Thank you for sharing your wisdom and grace, from the Capricorn Heights, a fellow Dhyan. Fly high, Samarpan. You are loved and missed.