In this excerpt from his memoir, Niranjan reflects on a rare one-to-one meeting with Osho that redirected his question from the Master’s intelligence to his own potential
There was one thing about Osho which was beyond the reach of my thinking mind. His intelligence would leave me totally astonished. I had never come across any other person with such sharp intelligence and ready wit. Howsoever complicated a problem or complex a situation, I never saw Osho stuck at any point. He would tackle any problem or answer any query by going to its very roots. His responses were always very spontaneous and most of the time based on his experience.
When I was in Osho’s presence, I wondered how it was possible for a single person to possess so many divine qualities. The love, the bliss and the grace one felt in Osho’s presence were something which I had not experienced before. I always found him relaxed, non-judgmental, having respect for everybody. His aesthetic sense, sensitivity towards everything happening around him, his non-complaining attitude, deep acceptance of whatever came his way, non-demanding nature, his punctuality, promptness to respond to anything and everything, fearlessness in any kind of situation, his immense clarity in speaking and thinking, his non-serious and humorous nature, his non-compromising in stating the truth and, above all, his compassion and supreme intelligence left me in awe of him. It was beyond my imagination as to how so many qualities could exist in a single person.
My confusion was whether these qualities were god-gifted or whether one needed to work hard to achieve them. My atheistic mind-set would make me restless. I was waiting for an appropriate opportunity to meet Osho in person and seek his insight. I did not dare to ask Osho in the small and informal meetings of ten to fifteen persons for fear of being laughed at by these people who were elderly and more learned. I had a feeling of inferiority in their presence. But as far as Osho was concerned, there was no such feeling in me. I was sure that whatsoever my question, he would not label it as trivial or mundane but would give it his total attention. I was eagerly waiting for an opportunity to see Osho when nobody was around. And to my great fortune such an opportunity did come my way.
When Osho was giving discourses in various colleges in Pune, there were no talks in the evening. After the talks I usually went to my office. The last such talk took place at Wadia College which was close to my house. So on that day, I first went home for tea. After my tea, as I started for my office, suddenly a thought struck me – why not go to meet Osho instead of going to the office? I changed my route and turned my two-wheeler towards Bafnaji’s house where Osho was staying. Within minutes I got there. It must have been around six in the evening. I was surprised to find the main door to the apartment wide open. So, without ringing the doorbell, I entered the house and it became obvious to me that there was nobody except Osho present in the house. Not even a servant! Osho was taking a stroll in the big hall. He was so engrossed in his walk that he did not pay attention to my arrival. I realised that the front door must have been kept open so nobody rang the doorbell and disturbed Osho.
Seeing him all alone I thought this was the best opportunity to ask my question. So without giving much thought to the fact that my question would disturb his aloneness, I stood a few steps away from him and asked in one breath, ‘Osho, you have such a supreme intellect. Is it self-earned or a god-given gift?’
Hearing my question, Osho, whose gaze was on the ground, raised his big, bright eyes to look straight into my eyes and said, ‘Stop the habit of asking wrong questions!’ I was shaken to my core with his sharp eyes focused directly at me and the tone of his voice. I could not understand what was wrong with my question.
His next words were, ‘Whenever you ask a question to anybody, always point the arrow of the question to yourself and not towards the person to whom you are asking. So if you get the right answer the arrow will penetrate you and you will benefit from it. For example to answer this question of yours – if I say to you that yes my intellect is self-earned, or I say that this intellect is a God-given gift, what will you gain from it? But looking into you, I have understood what you need to ask – how could I achieve this kind of intellect?’
His gaze was fixed on me as he spoke. After this he blinked and laughed sweetly, took a few steps towards me, put his hand on my shoulder and asked, ‘Right! Was this not what you should have asked me?’
This changed gesture of Osho relaxed me. I said, ‘Yes! Yes! It must be something like that.’
Osho then said, ‘Come, we will sit and talk.’
We went to the sitting area. Osho sat on the sofa and I sat on the floor near his feet. Osho started, ‘See, you have become too lazy, not only on a physical level but also on a mental level. You don’t go to the root of any matter. For instance, suppose you go and watch a movie and when you come out of the cinema hall someone asks you, ‘How was the movie?’ you will immediately reply ‘it was good’ or ‘not good,’ without even giving it a thought.
‘You don’t ponder even for a moment to analyse what was good about the movie and how it could have been better or what was not good and what needed to be removed or added to make it good. If you start contemplating in this way, soon you will find that you have greater intelligence than the director himself.
‘So start going deeper to get to the root of an issue. To make this possible, always remember one thing – that the dimension of any matter that appears before you is not the only dimension. There are more angles to it than are apparent to you. Try to find them too.
‘To help you understand this viewpoint, I will give you one example. Suppose if I place a coin on your palm, only fifty per cent of the coin is visible to you. So always remember that one has to be alert to find the hidden part of anything that appears before you. This way you will sharpen your intelligence and you will realize the brilliance of your luminous intelligence. To allow this to happen, you must put your total effort in this direction.’
At this point, Osho paused for a moment. While speaking he was looking at me with great compassion. I was not just listening to him, but absorbing what he was saying. Without blinking my eyes, I was looking at him with immense gratitude. Very rarely have I had such an experience of being totally present in any situation.
Osho continued, ‘As this sharpness of your intellect grows, you will have another insight. On one hand you will feel your intellect sharpening but at the same time a realization will dawn upon you that despite this intellect, there is no peace, no bliss inside. Only the glitter of intellect is there. As this feeling becomes deep in you, one day you will fall flat on the ground and cry, What do I do with this kind of intellect if there is no peace, no bliss within me? In this feeling of helplessness whatever will descend on you will be the gift of the divine. But for this to happen, you will have to put your total effort in it.’
Osho stopped here. He gave a loving smile to me. With tears in my eyes, my head bowed down at his feet. Osho held both my arms, made me sit near him, patted my shoulder and looked at me with great compassion.
Excerpted from chapter 4 (Put In Your Efforts) of Niranjan’s memoir, I Leave You My Dream
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- More excerpts on Osho News from I Leave You My Dream
I Leave You My Dream
(Osho Memoirs)
by Satya Niranjan (P.C. Bagmar)
Edited by Sushma Bharti
Hind Pocket Books, 2013, Second edition out of print
250 pages
ISBN-10: 8121618649
ISBN-13: 978-8121618649
eBook is in the making
amazon.in (out of print)
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