Divyam died on 10th March 2012
Sidika writes: “My dear friend Divyam died of pancreatic cancer on Saturday morning at 1am. The decline in her health was unexpectedly swift following her diagnosis with pancreatic and liver cancer on the 15th of February. Following a short period in Frenchay Hospital we were able to bring her home for the last three days of her life. She died peacefully surrounded by her family and friends.
“The cremation will take place next Tuesday, 20th March, at 3pm at Canford Crematorium, Canford Lane, Bristol BS9 3PQ.
“On 14th April (2-11pm) we will be holding a celebration of Divyam’s life with live music, tributes, food and dancing in Bristol.
“We also plan to create a book of appreciation to be given to Divyam’s family. If there is anything you’d like to be included in this please email it to: lovedivyam@gmail.com
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Ma Antar Divyam – A clear light beyond the dream
Divyam Butler was born on 15 May 1945 in Birkenhead, UK. Her brother Derek was a year older and her sister Stefanie was four years her senior. Divyam’s father was a gifted and determined man who started his working life as a coal miner and went on to become a professor of electrical engineering. Her mother died when Divyam was almost seven which had a profound effect on the whole family.
Divyam grew up in Sheffield in the north of England, and as a child liked to draw and read and loved to be out doors. As a teenager she designed and made a lot of her own clothes and enjoyed a hectic social life. She did well at school and went on to study languages at Cardiff University. When she was 21, she lived in Bristol with her brother Derek where she worked as a Civil Servant. She enjoyed walking in nature and visiting Bristol’s theatres, cinemas and restaurants. In 1970 she moved to London where she remained for the next 36 years apart from short spells living in India, Oregon and Germany.
Divyam had an intensely introspective streak, a passion for life and a challenging childhood – all great ingredients to lead her towards the spiritual path and Osho! She took sannyas in around 1981 and visited the Ranch in 1983. She was in India when Osho left his body which her long-time friend Prabuddho said had a profound effect on her. She was in Pune again for 6 months from autumn 1991 and then again for about a year from autumn 1992 – Born Again and No Mind were two of her favourite groups.
Niyati recalls this about her time with Divyam: “We shared a flat with Penny for a few months in 1993, in Meera Nagar ….. I remember when she did the Born Again, she was so comical and so young. I was 32 years old and she was 47 years young! Haha! Goodness I never would ever have believed she was 15 years older than me, I always thought she was so young at heart. What I remember was she was always keen to go to White robe often with Prabs (Prabuddho). I don’t know if she ever asked Osho a question. I think she did live at Medina though.”
Divyam lived in a number of house shares in London with other sannyasins and found great inspiration and support from her various meditation practices – primarily from Osho with a few other ones added for good measure. Her explorations led her to the Humaniversity in Holland where she participated in the Therapist Training and made many deep and long-lasting connections.
She had a variety of jobs during her life including A Fashion Drawing Teacher at a private academy, Psychological tester at a prison, Civil Servant, work in factories, offices, shops and canteens, Rent Control Officer in a Housing Co-operative, taught Art at a boys school, taught domestic science, art, sport and mental health at the Osho Ko Hsuan School in Devon, a Social Worker and Education Welfare Officer in London.
In 2006, Divyam moved back to Bristol where she moved into a Housing Co-operative which included several sannyasins – Sidika, Shanti, Ruchi & Avaroha. Sidika remembers how she loved Divyam’s off-beat sense of humour “she had impeccable comic timing, great characterisations and a range of accents – we had many a silly conversation in the kitchen in pseudo Welsh accents, and once did a double act as vampires at a Halloween party – Divyam managed to be chilling, sexy and hilarious in equal measure!”
Divyam worked more recently as a craniosacral therapist and Inner Relationship Focusing practitioner – in both of which she was extremely skilled. During her funeral service, a recording was played of Divyam describing the art of focusing and the qualities of a good listener – Sidika felt that she was unknowingly describing herself perfectly. Whilst in Bristol she studied various additional alternative therapies, joined Community Building in Britain and enjoyed diverse activities such as voice workshops, walking in nature, eating chocolate brownies in her favourite cafes, finding treasures in charity shops, recycling and adapting useful things, people-watching (she was always an astute observer of human nature) and striking up friendships. She was a member of a sannyasin women’s group and helped set up and run 1 day Enlightenment Intensive events in Bristol.
She was a regular visitor at Osho Leela in Dorset where she gave healing sessions and unveiled her immense comic talent in various performances. Divyam was also a very gifted artist and completed a ceramics degree as a mature student. She combined her art and her humour to create quirky cartoons – which sometimes adorned the little notes she left around the house e.g. reminding housemates to wash up or put their stuff away!
She was an immensely talented and complex person with a great passion for understanding herself and the world of emotions and sensation. She was a great listener and a wonderful friend to many – she had infinite patience, incredible sensitivity, understanding, great insight and an endearing humility and vulnerability.
Divyam valued her relationship with her family and was a much loved, fun and unique auntie to her niece and nephews and their children. She herself retained a beautiful childlike quality and directness (and sometimes ferociousness!) throughout her life. She loved to dance, had a beautiful voice – both speaking and singing, and especially laughing. Her youthful zest for life and openness belied her years and contributed in part to her popularity amongst the Balanced View community in Bristol which she joined in the last few months of her life.
She began to feel unwell in the latter part of 2011 but still managed to attend the UK sannyasins winter celebration at Croydon Hall – even participating in a burlesque workshop though she didn’t quite feel up to performing in the evening show. In February this year, Divyam was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. After a short time in hospital, she returned home where she died peacefully on 10 March, surrounded by her family and friends.
Her funeral took place on 20 March and incorporated spaciousness and silence (qualities which Divyam particularly esteemed) as well as beautiful live music from Tarisha. It will be followed on Saturday, 14 April by a celebration of her life to be held in Bristol – we’re having a big send off complete with satsang and live music from Presence, dancing, singing, comedy, probably some tears and lots of laughter.
Please contact Sidika on lovedivyam@gmail.com if you knew Divyam and would like details of the celebration or would like to contribute to an appreciation book to be given to her family. If you would like to make a donation in remembrance of Divyam, Macmillan Cancer Support and Marie Curie Cancer Care or a charity of your choice would be perfect. Thank you and love to you, Divyam from the many people whose lives you have touched and enriched – you will be long remembered and cherished in our hearts.
Sidika
Divyam’s send off
Family, friends and flowers filled the chapel at Canford Crematorium in Bristol last Tuesday. Six of us carried Divyam’s coffin up to the front, three family members and three friends, three of us men and three women. The coffin itself was bright, playful and the opposite of drab, much like our beloved Divyam. Painted handprints – all shapes and sizes – flowered in hot pink, purple, blue and silver all around the sides and a display of real flowers in the same vivid colours adorned the top. It was as if the hands of many friends whose lives had been touched by Divyam in turn now touched this box which contained her body, supporting it and leaving on it the imprint of their love.
Divyam’s brother, Derek, led the service beautifully and heartfelt tributes were shared by representatives and friends from the major areas of Divyam’s life – her family, the world of Osho, Community Building, Balanced View, the focussing and cranio-sacral communities and her Women’s Group.
Audio treats included hearing Divyam’s sweet voice, which Sidika and friends had edited from one of her mini discs, over the chapel sound system. She was describing the fine art of good listening – something at which she had developed great skill. The little audio extract culminated in a burst of beautiful laughter that evoked her perfectly. Tarisha graced us with her beautiful presence and also sang and played flute and keyboard.
When Derek invited anyone who wished to come up and lay a flower on the coffin, almost everyone did so. Some lingered, some gently touched the coffin, wishing her well on her journey.
After the service, almost everyone who had attended the service (and some who hadn’t) came back to Divyam’s flat in Clifton to eat and drink awesome and abundant refreshments provided by Dee and the Balanced View’s Clarity Cafe. The levels of noise and high spirits suggested an enhanced appreciation of life. The flat isn’t large, so accommodating over eighty people meant passing food on trays out in relays to the people crowded up the stairs outside.
Towards 9pm just a few of us remained and the last six of us sat with closed eyes and held hands silently in a circle for a while. Something in us which had been in perpetual motion all that day came to rest and settled. The flat felt very warm and full as though Divyam, whilst no longer there, had shared herself around, dissolving perhaps not just into the ether but also into us and the silence felt good. It felt like peace.
Nirjana
Divyam’s Death Celebration
There was a celebration of Divyam’s life in Bristol, UK on Saturday, 14 April.
During the weeks and days before the event it just grew and grew. As the organisers – Sidika and Nirjana — said in their programme, “Divyam’s celebration has morphed into a Festival Day!”
Many of Divyam’s friends were there, from near and far and from many areas and times of her life, sannyas and otherwise, together with members of her family.
The programme began at 3pm with an Osho satsang meditation with live music by Presence – probably a first experience of satsang for some of the guests. This was followed by tea and then everyone coming together beautifully for a heart dance, “The Way of the Heart”.
The whole event was full of heart, laughter, music, song, love, connecting, meditation, silence. I was touched when at the end, after Presence had finished their last song, a silence naturally fell over everyone and persisted despite the ending bell. And at times throughout the programme periods of silence naturally arose. One was after Suvarna’s song, ‘Come Home’ Divyam’s brother, Derek, had put much energy into creating a collage of pictures of Divyam throughout her life along the long wall of the hall. These and more and some video clips, including people’s tributes and music at the crematorium, where shown by him in a slide show with the background of some outstanding and varied music, including, as a background to Divyam’s teenage and coming of age years in the 60’s – “Hound Dog”. He said it had been a labour of love for him.
Divyam’s sister, Stef, who had been very present during Divyam’s last days, read a touching poem. Both she and her brother had been impressed by how Divyam had been intimately supported by her friends during that time.
I was struck by many things over the afternoon and evening. One was how, even after they have left their body, we get to know more about someone, what lives they had that we didn’t know about. For example, there was a tribute from an ex-lover who had lost track of Divyam several years ago after moving to America who had been traced by friends after her death; more about her family, her early years, interests and background I had no idea of – such a full and creative life.
Another was how powerful it is to come together to celebrate someone’s life. There was for me an unexpected and palpable, both powerful and fragile energy of that place where ‘two worlds meet’ and the many emotions that seem to inhabit that space.
There was masses of food, cooked by members of the Bristol ‘Balanced View’ community, many of whom also performed as tributes, poems or musical performances some beautiful and very touching renditions. Many others also contributed, including Prabuddho with a short comedy workshop. He also doubled very beautifully as MC, and sang and played guitar (if briefly) too. There was, later on the programme, something called, ‘Anything goes’ performances, and anything did in fact go. Phew!
Towards the end of the evening Sidika and Nirjana presented Stef and Derek with a book of appreciation with messages and cards from Divyam’s friends received during the last few weeks of her life and later at her funeral and celebration.
We joined with Presence in singing some Osho songs – including Fly Fly High, Ishq allah and Way of the Heart, which everybody knew by then. And some music to dance to and some music to listento too. And that silence….
Finishing around 11pm, we went home, full in our hearts, feeling we had really celebrated Divyam and ourselves.
Yatro
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