Born to Die

Subhan’s insights on life – and death

There’s a title of a recent song that sums up my life on Planet Earth: ‘Born to Die’. The moment I was born, I was starting to die… relentlessly moving toward death. No if… only when.

And what I do between these two – birth and death – is called my life. So, I am going to die. No question about that. The only question is: am I going to live?

I live with this understanding: what I do with this life is up to me.

I can be guided by fear and live small, not getting what I want; or, I can acknowledge the fear and still go for what I want, and, let existence decide the outcome.

I can be guided by the fear of making mistakes; or I can recognize that my early years on the planet were guided by a passion for life that never saw my exploration of it as a ‘mistake’ when it didn’t work… just as a piece of the puzzle in figuring out what it was all about, and how I could become more of it.

I can fight everything – especially my mind and all its creations – comparison, judgment, anxiety, worry and fear, to name a few; or, when I remember, I can be a watcher of the mind… no resistance… simply watching it do what it does, without identifying with it.

I can try to exclude people, situations, feelings and more, and be defeated by the painful results of that exclusion; or, I can learn to include what is… I can be big enough to include what the mind wants to exclude.

I can love and I can hate. I find that the two are not opposites, they are complementary and they do exist, side by side. (Haven’t you noticed?!) I discovered that the acceptance of the hate diminishes the need to act on it, and creates room for more love!

I can live without passion, without love, carefully tip-toeing through a passionless, loveless life, or I can explore what stops the passion, what stops the love, and then find as many ways as possible to invite them back into my life so that it is truly lived!

I recognize that it is never too late to be alive, until my last breath. And every moment provides the opportunity to jump into life – the same way I used to jump into the pool as a boy.

For this New Year, I wish we have the capacity to explore all the challenges that we face, and to find the support we need: from knowing friends, from loving companions, from all the incredible mystics that have roamed this planet, and from delving deep within ourselves to reconnect with the essential nature that is waiting there for us.

Subhan took sannyas in 1979, lived on the Ranch for four years, and spent many years in Poona from 1979-1997. He co-founded the Osho Marketplace Network in Poona, and facilitated several groups there, including: Finding the Work You Love, Finding the Life You Love, and Transforming Tension. He sang and played keyboard in Oregon and in Poona. He was a lawyer at the Ranch and is now a certified counselor and Meditation facilitator in Seattle. worldofmeditation.com