Beloved Osho, Will you give me a few more laws to come out of my confusion?
Devageet: When all else fails, read the instructions.
Women are meant to be loved, not to be understood.
Moscow is the city where, if Marilyn Monroe should walk down the street with nothing on but shoes, people would stare at her feet first.
When people agree with you, you must be wrong.
Women’s minds are cleaner than men’s; they change them more often.
After thirty-five a man begins to have thoughts about women. Before that age he had feelings.
I have told Devageet, “You must cut your sex life to half.” He inquired of me: “Which half? Thinking about it or talking about it?”
The human race never solves any of its problems – it only outlives them.
Assumption is the mother of all screwups.
What you resist, you become.
No matter how many excellent decisions you make in a working day, people will only remember the single bad one.
No man is lonely while eating spaghetti – it requires so much attention.
You can always find what you are not looking for.
In any organization there will always be one person who knows what is going on. This person must be fired.
Don’t ever prophesy, for if you prophesy wrong nobody will forget it, and if you prophesy right nobody will remember it.
One can survive everything nowadays except death.
Evil, what is evil? There is only one evil: to deny life.
If you can keep calm while all those around you are freaking out, then you don’t understand the problem.
Inscription on the tombstone of Peter the Pessimist: I knew this would happen one day.
A KGB agent comes across a Jew reading a Hebrew grammar book on a bench in Gorky Park. “Hey, Jew,” he says, “Why are you bothering to read that? You know we will never let you go to Israel.”
“Well,” says the Jew, “I’m reading it in case they speak Hebrew in heaven.”
“And what if you go to hell?”
“Ah,” sighs the Jew, “Russian I already know.”
So if you really want to get out of confusion, Devageet, read Russian. That’s where you are bound to go!
A woman was filling out an application form at the bank when she came to the space for age. She hesitated a long time. Finally, the clerk leaned over and said, “The longer you wait, the worse it gets.”
Osho, The Invitation, Ch 30, Q 1