A simple insight by Punya.
During the last two days there have been two incidents during which I could see exactly:
I have the choice to go this way or that way.
Yesterday, after a long walk in the beautiful woods of the Causey Arch valley, and a deserved break at the coffee shop (a traditional cheese scone, decaf americano and a shared brownie-cheesecake) we were going to take the bus home. It was scheduled to arrive shortly. But we were a bit early… early enough to walk along the road to the next bus stop.
The noise of the fancy family cars and coupés, whooshing past at high speed on the all-weather tarmac was just bearable – just. We waited at the bus stop perhaps 15 minutes past the scheduled time, and still no sign of a green X-line bus around the corner. “It’s a bank holiday. They might have skipped a service,” was Amiten’s take. He turned around and started walking. I went along. After a few minutes, I heard behind me the heavy rumble. Here comes the bus! I wave it down with broad arm movements like a windmill from Holland, but of course the driver cannot stop if we are not standing exactly at the Bus Stop. Even if it is his fault, because he is late!
The pot started boiling. I had had enough with walking along that road! And it was hot under the sun, but still cold around the neck because of a frigid easterly wind. What an opportunity to be angry at my most beloved partner for not waiting a bit longer! Now because of him I have to suffer, damn, walking along this noisy road! And he even had the cheek to say, “You should not have listened to me!”…
But I had a choice!
I could also just remain with the discomfort. OK, I keep walking then and make the best of this. And why should I spoil our beautiful day with being angry? After a short time, an inspiration… I remembered a path that ran behind a housing estate on our left. Maybe we could find it again? Amiten was ready to explore, and there was the closed pub. Amiten even remembered that the path started just behind the abandoned building. The walk back home between the fields on one side and the back gardens on the other, with their mile-a-minutes, red acers, wisteria hanging over their fences, was a delight. And the day ended in harmony, love and joy.
And today…
After a comfy visit at my sister-in-law’s we were dropped off at the cycle path so that we could walk home and stretch our legs. Amiten finally had the opportunity to tell me that up at the medical centre he had been informed that tomorrow morning I was not going to see my GP, as I had expected, but ‘only’ a nurse. I had been looking forward to finally discussing with my doctor the new medication I was meant to take. And now tomorrow it will only be about taking the yearly blood test?
Here again was this moment of choice, and again while walking on a path along blossoming trees! I knew there was just a fraction of time before I would fall either this or the other way – like balancing myself on the tip of a toothpick.
It would have been such a wonderful opportunity to fall into my well-known whining helplessness in regard to the workings of the National Health system, with its rather convoluted ways of communication. Tears were already popping up. Poor me! Again I am left behind. They do not care. Just because I am an old lady. They couldn’t care less if I am dead or alive.
Then to the rescue came the thought, “Well, at home I can prepare in writing the questions I want to ask the nurse. She can then refer them to the doctor or put them in writing into the system. And if I do not get any answers from her, I can book an appointment with the GP right then and there.” And on we walked, enjoying the fragrance of the hawthorn in bloom. It’s their year, it seems. Maybe because it was so cold in spring, they are out now with such vigour? The sun hot on my back, and the cold wind nipping at my scarf.
Comments are closed.