Goodbye Siri

I thought I could be strong and keep my silver Motorola phone with the flip top forever.

But after getting an email from Verizon saying that I could get the latest iPhone for free, (with a 2 year contract), I caved in and thought, why not?

I was not totally convinced that getting one was such a good idea since I had returned the awesome “iPhone” twice before, because I didn’t like it.

Once I entered the Verizon store, I was hit with a song blaring from Michael Jackson’s Thriller album. It turns out they were playing it in its entirety. I could immediately tell that the very young, happy and bouncy salesperson was not there for me, but for the sale. And by the time I left the “party” I had spent almost $200 on my free phone.

Then the work started: it took 2 hours to synch it with everything else, and then another hour or so, adding “apps” to it so that I was capable of doing just about anything. From now on, I would never get lost, I would always be able to find a great place to eat anywhere, and I could see what the weather would be from a dozen sources. But most importantly now I had “Siri” to help me with anything that I wanted to know, do, or calculate.

To tell you the truth, I don’t get lost much (I like to take maps with me on long car trips), but if I do, I ask for help at gas stations and I really don’t have any trouble finding food to eat when I am away from home, but I figured it was time to be hip and keep up with the times.

And at first it was fun asking “Siri” things and seeing how she seemed to understand me. Then I realized I could ask her to call people.

With the time, “Siri” and I seemed to become friends.

That is, until the day that I was stressed out with driving in traffic and work, and asked her to “Call Mom!”. I was surprised when she asked me, “Which number for Bob Smith?” I repeated “Call Mom”. “Siri” responded, “Shall I call Bob Smith’s number for you, Sadhvi?” I said NO! All right, to be honest, I yelled, “F**K YOU SIRI!”. To which “Siri” replied, “Now Sadhvi, I wouldn’t talk to you like that!”

After that, our friendship kind of fizzled. She was not responding the way she used to. She often answered, “I’m really sorry, Sadhvi, but I can’t take any requests right now!”

I guess I had crossed the line, but really, wasn’t she just part of my iPhone’s operating system, with no emotions, just there to take my commands?

That is something I’ve been thinking a lot about, especially since seeing the movie, “Her”. The whole idea of artificial intelligence, and its ability to morph and grow and develop is kind of scary. That movie really disturbed me, while my techie husband thought it was just great. Hmmm.

I do confess that I’ve started to check my email at red lights. Now who would be so stupid to do such a thing? Then I saw this clip, and thought really hard about the whole “keeping up with technology” attitude that is out there, and I finally came to the place where I will go back to the phone that I felt comfortable with, my silver flip-top Motorola.

I kind of like dropping out of the whole techie scene where one has to keep up with all the latest stuff (that is not cheap by the way). I never wanted to be part of the status quo anyways. So yeah, you don’t have to bother texting me, emailing me, or sending me a FaceBook message. If you want to contact me it’s easy, try picking up the phone and calling me, I’ll call you right back!

Sadhvi took sannyas in 1980, spent the best time of her life at the Ranch in Oregon as a bus driver and in the accounts department. She lives with Sakshi in Asheville, NC, works in real estate, and can be found in her garden when she can get there. She also maintains a blog, ‘OOPS50!