When somebody really loves you, he will not say, “I love you.”

Many people come to me and say, “This girl loved me, she said it herself.”
“This man loved me and now the love has disappeared.”
They were both deceived by words.

Dale Carnegie suggests that even if you have been married for twenty years,
don’t forget to keep using the same words you used
when you were courting your wife – continue.
Every morning say the same as you did when you were courting.
Don’t drop those words.
Every day say, “Nobody exists like you.
You are the most beautiful person in the world, and I will die without you.”

Dale Carnegie says that even if you don’t feel it,
go on saying it, because words are realities.
And the wife will be deceived and the husband will be deceived,
because we live by words alone.
You don’t know anything else, you don’t know anything real.

How can you be in contact with reality?
When someone says, “I love you” – finished!
When someone says, “I hate you” – finished!
Put aside the words and look at the person.
When someone says, “I love you,”
don’t get entangled with the words, put them aside.
Look at the person, at his or her totality.
Then nobody can deceive you.

Love is such a fire you will be able to see it,
you will be able to touch it,
you will be able to know whether it is there or not.

Love cannot be hidden.
If it is there, really, words are not needed.
When somebody really loves you,
he will not say, “I love you.”
It is not needed.
Love is enough unto itself – it needs no salesmanship.
It doesn’t need anybody to persuade, to convince;
it is enough, it is a fire.
Nothing is more fiery than love, it is a flame.
And when there is a flame in the dark
you need not say anything about it. It is there.
No advertisement is needed, no propaganda is needed.

Osho, The Empty Boat, Ch 9 (excerpt)