Subhan writes, “I’ve since discovered that there is nothing like equal,” and “…the notion of ‘I’ starts to slip away.”
I remember my days in what was then called, Junior High School. I so much wanted to be like my peers. So I wore the same belt-in-the-back khaki pants, and button-down collared shirts. I wore the same pea green military jacket. And I had several pairs of Weejun loafers. I got close to the right hairstyle, even though my hair was curly and not straight like Ricky Nelson or Elvis! But no matter how hard I tried to “fit in,” I always felt a distance from the others.
It was only somewhere in high school that I started to explore some of my uniqueness! And by the time I got to college, I could even appreciate some of my “differences.”
Still, little did I know then how truly unique I really was – just like everyone else really is!
And in that uniqueness, I’ve since discovered that there is nothing like “equal.” By the very nature of uniqueness, it cannot be compared to someone else. And that experience, throughout the years, has given me many moments of gratitude for just being who I am.
Only now, even that “being who I am” is disappearing, as the notion of “I” starts to slip away. In those moments, peace and understanding appear; and acceptance of whatever is becomes available.
Of course, there is still a constant forgetting, and a return to identifying with the mind! But, at some point, that leads again to a re-membering; and for a few moments, once again, there is peace and gratefulness….
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