Credit to Fatima
Kulula is a low-cost South-African airline that doesn’t take itself too seriously. It’s head office is situated in Johannesburg. Kulula airline attendants make an effort to make the in-flight “safety lecture” and announcements a bit more entertaining.
There was a Japanese man who went to India for sightseeing. On the last day, he hired a cab and told the driver to drive to the airport. During the journey, a Honda drove past the taxi. The Japanese tourist leaned out of the window excitedly and yelled: “Honda, very fast! Made in Japan!” After a
The husband leans over and asks his wife, “Do you remember the first time we had sex together over fifty years ago? We went behind the village tavern where you leaned against the back fence and I made love to you.” “Yes,” she says, “I remember it well.” “OK,” he says, “How about taking a
So you’re a sick senior citizen and the government says there is no nursing home available for you, what do you do? Our plan gives anyone 65 years or older a gun and 4 bullets. You are allowed to shoot four Congressmen. Of course, this means you will be sent to prison where you will
1. Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience. 2 The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it’s still on my list. 3. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
Two little old ladies, Dorace & Jackie, were sitting on a park bench outside the local town hall where a flower show was in progress.
Paddy thought the letters ‘LOL’ meant ‘Lots Of Love’. So he sent the following text to his girlfriend: “You’re the only girl in my…
A little boy goes to his father and asks, “Daddy, how was I born?” The father answers, “Well, son, I guess one day you will need to find out anyway! Your Mom and I first got together in a chat room on Yahoo. Then I set up a date via e-mail with your Mom and we met at
For those struggling to ban women from wearing Burqa in their countries, Mustafa Kemal, best known as ‘Attaturk’, the founder of modern Turkey resolved…
In the year 2011, the Lord came unto Noah, who was now living in Europe, and said: “Once again, the earth has become wicked and…
As a joke, my brother Jay used to hang a pair of panty hose over his fireplace before Christmas. He said all he wanted…
A keen young immigrant Indian Marwari applied for a salesman’s job at London’s premier downtown department store.
Mrs. Ravioli comes to visit her son Anthony for dinner. He lives with a female roommate, Maria. During the course of the meal, his…
A young cowboy in a saloon on a Saturday night recognized the elderly man standing next to him at the bar as a famous…
A Chinese guy goes to a Jew to buy black bras, size 38. The Jew, known for his skills as a businessman, says that…
A very tired nurse walks into a bank, totally exhausted after an 18-hour shift. Preparing to write a cheque, she pulls a rectal thermometer out of her purse and tries to write with it. When she realizes her mistake, she looks at the flabbergasted teller, and without missing a beat, she says: ‘Well, that’s great….that’s
Moishe Goldberg was heading out of the Synagogue one day, and as always Rabbi Mendel was standing at the door, shaking hands as the…
A visitor to Israel attended a recital and concert at the Moscovitz Auditorium. He was quite impressed with the architecture and the acoustics. He inquired of…
It was entertainment night at the Senior Citizens Center. Claude the hypnotist explained: “I’m here to put you into a trance; I intend to…
An elderly man and woman, both in their 70’s, walk into a sex therapist’s office. The doctor asks, ‘What can I do for you?’…
Imagine the following: you have just made it through your wedding ceremony and have stepped out on the front steps of the church. The…
1. Law of Mechanical Repair – After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and you’ll have to pee.…
A little boy got on the bus, sat next to a man reading a book, and noticed he had his collar on backwards. The little…
A man goes into the confessional box after years being away from the Church. He pulls aside the curtain, enters and sits himself down.…
One dark night outside a small town, a fire started inside the local chemical plant and in a blink it exploded into flames. The…
A young man is visiting his grandparents in rural Virginia. His grandfather is sitting on the porch in his rocking chair, naked from the waist down
An elderly man get up and puts on his coat, telling his wife he is going to the doctor. Surprised, his wife asks, “Why, are you sick?” “No,” he says. “I’m going to get me some of those new Viagra Pills.” With that, his equally elderly wife gets up out of her rocker and starts
An explorer in the deepest Amazon suddenly finds himself surrounded by a bloodthirsty group of cannibals. Upon surveying the situation, he says quietly to…
It’s Saturday morning and the father has an incredible desire to make love with his wife, but doesn’t know what to do with their 5 year old son. Without further…
The newlyweds just arrived in the honeymoon suite of a Caribbean resort. She comes out of the bathroom in a bathrobe, looking gorgeous. She…
An atheist was walking through the woods. “What majestic trees! What powerful rivers! What beautiful animals!” He said to himself. As he was walking alongside the river,…