What else happened in Amsterdam?

There was also a venue called “Paradiso.” ²⁶ They brought big rock concerts there, famous bands of the Seventies. There was also “The Cosmos Center”, a cozy, aesthetic, drug-free place where they taught yoga classes, meditation, healing and various topics related to spiritual development. There I also later became acquainted with my teacher Bonnie and the Bach Flowers Remedies, which became an important part of my life.

There was a café at the Cosmos serving health food and healthy delicious cakes. I became acquainted there with many food types which did not exist in Israel at the time; for instance, muesli – a mixture of cereals, nuts, fruits and yogurt. These things arrived in Israel twenty years later. On Fridays, in a wide hall, upholstered with carpets and illuminated with soft lights, I was first introduced to freestyle dancing. We danced, barefoot and liberated, to world music, to all types of rhythm. That was where my love journey with dancing began. I gave my body the freedom to express itself, dancing for hours with myself, for myself, for my body-Soul.

That is how the people around me were as well. We did not dance to impress anyone. We usually danced with our eyes closed, and when I opened them, I often encountered smiling eyes and open hearts. I have never connected to different dance methods, such as folk dancing, ballroom dancing, classical or modern dancing. I could not dictate to my body how to move and dance, fixing its movements by learning steps and set moves. As usual, something about imitating someone else didn’t work out for me. It did not make sense to me that the head is commanding the body while the body knows how to move naturally. We just have to let it be, expressing itself freely, moving and flowing from its own wisdom.

My connection to my body deepened and refined through freestyle dancing, and I found the need to eat more nutritious food in proper quantities. The vegetarian restaurant on the premises helped me fine-tune the way. I must say that the Friday freestyle dancing was attended by a lot of people dressed in orange – looking back at it, they were sannyasins, disciples of Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh (Osho). I noticed that they added vital, free, liberated energy to the place in the way they moved their bodies, as well as in their lightness and Joy of life. I later learned that just past the street of the Cosmos Center was a boat that was a meditation center of those sannyasins.

Bach Flower Essences

One Friday, an Israeli friend and I arrived early at the Cosmos Center with time to spare before the free dance. We asked around what else there was to do there. We were recommended to enter the American teacher Bonnie’s Bach Flowers class. Bonnie was a lively woman. She demonstrated how it is possible to feel refined energies and the different frequencies of the flower essences inside small bottles. My friend and I looked at each other with typical Israeli skepticism, and then the lesson ended. Bonnie looked us directly in the eyes and said, “I invite you to come next week at the same time.” We nodded politely but between us agreed that this probably would not happen.

But as fate would have it, the following week we were again early for the dancing. We decided to give Bonnie’s class another go. We got to the lesson, and were quite surprised to find that suddenly we experienced sensitivity in our fingers. We could actually feel the energy radiating from each of the flower essence bottles. Some of them we could feel more strongly than others, and Bonnie informed us that “these are the flowers that are suitable for your healing and internal balance right now.” Indeed, when we read the qualities of those flowers, we felt it was accurate.

A short time after, I heard about someone doing Bach Flowers energetic readings. I went to meet her. The first flower she took out of the box for me was Wild Oat. She explained that it appeared for me while she sensed my aura and read it. She said I was in an internal search, that this flower essence might help me focus. It felt accurate. I was very excited. Even though I had my eyes closed, I could perceive in my body and feel her way of checking while she read my aura. Something in me knew that this was an activity I would like to learn and experience more.

A Home of My Own!

In the meantime, I had already moved into my own flat that I got from the quarter squatters’ movement. There was a building designated for renovations that remained vacant. Sometimes, the process of a building waiting in a queue to get renovated used to take years. Meanwhile, the building could be given to people who needed a home. There was a squatters’ movement office in almost every quarter in Amsterdam. These young people administrated the distribution of keys and just gave flats to people in need. It did not matter to whom, why and where a person came from. Such a house is called in Dutch “kraken house.” ²⁷

I got a wide flat in a triangular-structured attic. Once again, the “Triangle Principle” was appearing in my life. I furnished it with furniture, carpets, a gas heater, and a refrigerator. Everything was found in the street in mint condition. I paid sixty guilders ²⁸ a month (a funnily low amount) for electricity and gas; we used it to heat water and the apartment. I could not believe how warm and cozy the winter could be. We walked around the house wearing a short-sleeved shirt. You do not have to live internally cramped in winter! It was a huge upgrade for those who came from Israel in those days, where we used to huddle in the winter around an oil heater, and there was always a feeling of cramped cold.

For the first time ever, I felt like I belonged somewhere. It is interesting that the Dutch call Amsterdam “Mokum.” ²⁹ Sometimes friends visited me in Amsterdam. I enjoyed touring around with them, showing them the city’s special places. I wore “tourist eyes,” and through them I saw and discovered the beauty again and again, from different angles. I was in love with the city of Amsterdam. I loved wandering along through the alleys and the canals, indulging in the artistic beauty of the refined architecture of the houses tightly built next to each other. I marvelled at their different colors and rounded designs that varied in shape, especially at the tops of the buildings.

There was something so familiar there that gave me the feeling of being at home. I will never forget the narrow, steep stairs in these houses. One morning, on my way to work, while still half-drowsy, I tripped on the stairs of my home, fell and cracked my right arm. Nothing could be done to heal, and to this day my arm sensitively reminds me of the days of Amsterdam, in my attic that I received as a gift.

“Kundalini Meditation!”

One day, one of my girlfriends visited me, all excited. “I have to show you what I learned today. I learned Kundalini Meditation!” she cried. It turned out that she was visiting that boat in front of the Cosmos Club, belonging to the orange-dressed sannyasins of Bhagwan Rajneesh. She showed me how she shook and rattled her body, “shaking the Kundalini,” she said and explained. I looked at her as if she had gone crazy (my cynical Israeli mind again). These orange people, I thought, maybe they are really weird after all. Maybe my anthroposophist friend was right. In those days, my best friend from the pub where I worked read the books of Rudolf Steiner, who pioneered the anthroposophic spiritual way of living. I was interested in this way too, thanks to her.

Anthroposophy offers a healthy diet, a different and more natural approach to education, and deep spiritual work. I learned a lot from reading Rudolf Steiner’s books. I also looked for a way to experience it. I attended a dance course called Eurythmy, but it did not really satisfy me. In the end, I experienced the anthroposophical approach as too dogmatic for my character.

In the meantime, I continued visiting the Cosmos Center and the Milky Way – two very different worlds yet perfectly complementing each other. I enjoyed opening up through both venues. Both had a place within me. In later years, back in Israel, they tried to imitate these places, but “freestyle dancing” in a sports hall, with a concrete ceiling and floor, does not really do it for me.

I Know How to Cook!

Over time, I felt the need to change the type of work I was engaged in. I got tired of the idle chit-chat in the bar, with people in need of company. Luckily, I did not need a lot of money, because I did not have to pay rent, except for 60 guilders a month for the gas that was supplied to my kraken house. One day, I saw a sign at a café where I used to sit sometimes for a hot chocolate drink with whipped cream. The sign said that they were looking for a vegetarian food cook – right here, in the nice little restaurant in one of the alleys between the canals in the old Jordan neighborhood. ³² I went inside and offered my services as a cook.

To this day, I do not know who it was who spoke confidently from inside me. I was asked: “Do you know how to cook?” I replied, “Yes, of course I know how to cook!” The truth was that I had never cooked until then! It’s a pity that of all things, my mother did not teach me to cook. The kitchen belonged to Mom. She did not like to be interfered with there. Not that I meant to lie. Something inside me knew that I would manage, that it would be okay.

I was asked to cook a full lunch daily for about 25-30 people! I arrived the next day, checked and found in the kitchen several crates with different kinds of vegetables. When it came to spices, I could only find salt and pepper. It turned out that the former cook was English. “I need spices,” I declared as befits a Middle Eastern cook. They gave me money right away, directing me to a small shop not far from the restaurant. I stood in the middle of the spice shop and started sniffing. I imagined my mother’s kitchen, the only kitchen I knew, and concentrated on finding familiar smells. I recognized turmeric, cumin, thyme, and rosemary. I bought everything and went back to my new kitchen.

Well, I said to myself, I will cut a lot of vegetables, cook them in water and season them with the spices I bought; something will come out of it. Then the smells began to spread and fill the restaurant. The regular customers waited patiently. It took me a little longer than their usual waiting time. They came to take a peek at the new cook and were very excited by the new smells. It turns out that the previous cook, the English one, used to cook them vegetables and mostly potatoes with salt and some black pepper only. To my delight, the customers licked their fingers. I got a job for three days a week, which provided me with all my financial needs, and gave me the freedom to have fun and do many other things I loved.

Carlos

One day, one of my girlfriends told me excitedly about some South American guy, an Argentinian named Carlos. He cooked healthy macrobiotic food in a restaurant called “The Garden,” located in the prestigious museum area of Amsterdam. It sounded intriguing, so we went to check it out. It was a nicely decorated place with clean, simple lines and soft white and pink colors. Special smells filled the restaurant. The menu featured healthy and balanced food consisting of whole grain rice, buckwheat or other whole grains, vegetables, legumes, tofu, salad, seaweed, and more. I joined my friend in order to try this food, and to meet the legendary Carlos. Indeed, it was really a restaurant with a pleasant atmosphere, inducing an inspiring sense of health.

Then out came Carlos. He was probably about ten years older than us. A handsome guy, with raven-black smooth hair hanging on his shoulders, and piercing black eyes on a light brown face. He projected a presence of a different kind. He personally served us a delicious balanced meal. Then he invited us to his place, which was not far from the restaurant. I was thrilled. His medium-sized flat was called an “attic” – a Dutch rooftop apartment with two interconnecting rooms. I will never forget the one-of-a-kind aesthetic there. Fabrics and South American embroidery on the walls, in colors that blended harmoniously with the carpets that covered the floor. A pleasant Indian patchouli scent soaked everything. Carlos had a large collection of books on various subjects and records of world music, classical and rock.

I sat down on one of the mattresses, sinking into the colorful pillows. I did not know where to start looking around me. I felt completely at home in this magical world. Suddenly, my eyes fell on a booklet [magazine, ed. *] lying on the table called Sannyas. I began to leaf through its pages. At first, I read the paragraphs that were highlighted. Then I found myself sinking more and more into a wonderful and fascinating world: the world of Tantra! The text was new and familiar at the same time and drew me into it completely. I forgot about everyone around me including Carlos. Then it got very late. All I desired was to borrow this booklet, so that I could finish reading the article.

After a little hesitation, he agreed on the condition that I return it within two days. Carlos said that this booklet was beloved and very important to him, and that it came from India. I did not know more than that then. I did not know that it was the monthly booklet that was published in Pune, in the ashram of Osho – then called Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh.

This booklet was dedicated to excerpts from Osho’s talks on Tantra, a topic I had never heard of before. I went home with the booklet and stayed awake all night, and with the help of a dictionary, I deciphered every word, absorbing what was written. Carlos received the booklet back the next day. That night, a fascinating new world had opened up for me. Something inside me said, follow Carlos.

I kept meeting Carlos, from time to time, when I came to eat at the restaurant or dancing at the Milky Way club. I especially remember the dance to “Hotel California,” which was the big hit at that time. It was music I really liked, playing in harmony with its meaningful lyrics, which lit up the desire to dive into the mystery of life. There, at the club, with marijuana smoke filling the space, I moved between dim colored lights, my feet trodding on the soft carpets, and I flowed, diving into the music.

At the same time, I felt that Carlos’s presence gave me a feeling of confidence and inner knowing that I am on the right path. I loved Carlos. It was not a romantic kind of love (he had a girlfriend). It was a different kind of love. It was an attraction deriving from the depths of my Soul. Attraction I had never known before. His English wasn’t good enough (back then I still did not speak Spanish), but things between us were beyond words.

One evening, Carlos approached me while dancing and said: “Next week I am going to the island of Ibiza in Spain. We are going to open a vegetarian restaurant there, similar to the Garden restaurant.” To my surprise, I heard myself replying right away, “I am also going down to Ibiza, I will be there in a couple of weeks. See you there.” Who said that? I just knew I had to be where Carlos was. I did not ask any more questions. Within a week he was no longer seen in the city. It was clear to me that I was looking for a ride to Spain. It turned out that I did not have to search too much. A friend of a friend planned to drive his Volkswagen Beetle with several people from Amsterdam to Barcelona. He had one spot left – for me!

It was interesting to follow that clear and determined inner voice which appeared at key moments in my life – a voice that supported my inner search. When I listen to the voice and just follow it, things work out for themselves. In just two weeks, I found myself in a full-fledged Volkswagen heading south towards Barcelona.

At a stopover, around 6:30 am at a Parisian café, I tried to imitate those who were in line before me: “ahn cafe ole und ahn croissant.” I was told that French people do not understand or prefer not to understand English, so I made an effort for them. It was worth it – I got the best coffee and croissant!

By lunchtime we were already in Barcelona. I sat down with a sigh of relief. We were sitting in a traditional restaurant with the whole gang that I had been crammed with in a Volkswagen until that moment. We were hungry. Someone from the group knew what was customary to eat in Spain. He ordered paella ³³ for all of us. It was served in a huge round pan covering the whole table. There was a lot of golden rice, and between its grains peeked out all kinds of small heads and tentacles. “COCKROACHES!!!” I squealed. I could not believe my eyes. This was seafood I had never seen. Seafood was not known in the kosher Land of Israel in the Seventies. Since I was very hungry, I tried to eat the rice in between the creatures. I would not have imagined then that years later I would overcome the appearance of the shrimp, and the Jewish conditioning of kosher versus non-kosher food. Who would have thought I would taste and even enjoy their flavor! After the joint meal, each of the passengers continued on their way. I headed towards the port of Barcelona, in search of the night ferry that sails to the Spanish island of Ibiza.

Notes

• 26) Paradiso is a Dutch music venue and cultural center located in Amsterdam.
• 27) Squatting in the Netherlands (“kraken” in Dutch) is the occupation of unused or derelict buildings or land without the permission of the owner. The modern squatters’ movement (“kraakbeweging” in Dutch) began in the 1960s in the Netherlands.
• 28) The guilder was the currency of the Netherlands from the 15th century until 2002, when it was replaced by the euro.
• 29) Mokum (מקום) is the Yiddish word for “place” or “safe haven”. It is derived from the Hebrew word “makom” (מקום, “place”). In Yiddish, the names for some cities in the Netherlands and Germany were shortened to “Mokum” and had the first letter of the name of the city, in the Hebrew alphabet, added to them. Cities named this way were Amsterdam, Berlin, Delft, and Rotterdam.
• 30) In Hinduism, Kundalini is a form of divine feminine energy (or Shakti) believed to be located at the base of the spine, in the Muladhara (sacral) chakra. It is an important concept in Shiva Tantra, where it is believed to be a force or power associated with the divine feminine or the formless aspect of the Goddess. This energy in the body, when cultivated and awakened through Tantric practice, is believed to lead to spiritual liberation.
• 31) Eurythmy is an expressive movement art originated by Rudolf Steiner in conjunction with his wife Marie in the early 20th century. Primarily a performance art, it is also used in education, especially in Waldorf schools for therapeutic purposes.
• 32) The Jordan is a neighborhood in the city of Amsterdam, Netherlands in the borough of Amsterdam-Centrum.
• 33) Paella is a rice dish originally from Valencia and is regarded as Spain’s national dish. It became customary for cooks to combine rice with vegetables, beans, and dry cod. Along Spain’s Mediterranean coast, rice was predominantly eaten with fish.
• *) Sannyas was a bi-monthly magazine, published between 1972 and 1981 (sannyas.wiki)

Awakening Now
My Life with Osho
A Spiritual Memoir
by Ma Anand Sambhavya
buddhafieldflowers.com
Self-published, May 2026, 372 pages
ISBN-13: ‎ 979-8197443823
ASIN: ‎B0H2DFG79T
ASIN: ‎B0H2DT5LD4
Amazon *

Related articles

• Awakening Now: My Life with Osho – short reviews of the book
• Living and working in Osho’s Centres and Communes in the Netherlands – An interview with Dharmen
• Living as a kraker in A’dam – Apurva’s squatting adventures in Amsterdam, in March 1980
• Flower Essences for the New Man – Sambhavya, creator of the Buddhafield Flower Essences, talks to Punya

Featured image: Sambhavya in Pune

Sambhavya

Anand Sambhavya is the creator of the Buddhafield Flower Essences and author of the memoir, Awakening Now: My Life with Osho – buddhafieldflowers.com